We All Have Our Stories

I got to sit and chat the other night with someone I am close to who is going through a very hard time. A real hard time too, not just a rough patch. She has spent more time in hospitals than she has at home and knows enough to be a doctor at this point.

As she recanted her awful past few months, she wrapped it up quite quickly and said “…but we all have our stories right?”

Not only did it catch me off guard then but it has stuck with me since our conversation – we all have our stories. Instead of dwelling on every agonizing day, she wanted to move past it. She wanted to get through, not only for our conversation but I believe in general. She wanted to move on and to hear other stories about my crazy little life and chat with the other people we were joined with at dinner.

I know I have my stories and I have some bad ones too. My whole life I carry them around but I try not to let them way me down. In my household, holidays and birthdays are a day we reflect on our stories and we are thankful for the way things seem to be turning out. Most days I set my sad stories on a shelf, way up high and I dust them off for said holidays and birthdays.

Dwelling on those sad stories can hold you back. You might miss an opportunity while you are dwelling on events gone by.

I recently came across this post from Indie Business that posted the 10 Things That Oprah Knows for sure. While I like most of them, number three was my favorite: Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only you give it power.

So what are you going to do with your stories? Let them hold you back or make you more driven? I think it is up to you.

5 Replies to “We All Have Our Stories”

  1. So true. Some days your stories get the better of you, and I think it’s important to nurture yourself and let that be ok, but you’re right, you can’t let your stories be your life and hold you back. Another perspective along the same lines is that I like to remind myself that you never know what is going on with another person. That grouchy person in line at the gorcery store, the car trhat drives past you like a bat out of hell, or even someone you know who is behaving strangely. You have no idea what is going on for them in that moment, and I try to remember that before I let their energy seep into my day. Compassion goes a long way.

    1. You have always been good at being compassionate. Remembering that we don’t know what other people are going through or carrying with them is very important. Thanks for the reminder.

  2. Beautiful and so important to me right now. A classmate of my son’s committed suicide last week. He found out at school and texted me. I went to the kids wall and saw that in the past my son had wished him happy birthday. I can’t describe the sense of relief that my son had been kind to him. Like all kids, my son can be a pain in the ass to other people, has a smart ass sarcastic streak (apple meet tree.) My son was upset, cried and was angry. He’s had time to think about it and he’ll never know what caused this kid to kill himself. But we have been able to talk about the role that kindness plays both to the person we offer it to, and to ourselves. Hopefully his big takeaway is the kindness costs nothing, but pays dividends. Huge ones. And you may never get to see them.

    1. George, I am so sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through. Suicide is something you may never get the full answer to. Teaching your children kindness is one of the best things you can do as a parent. As Rickie also said above, we don’t know what stories people are carrying with them or what they have going on. I hope you and your family are doing well and you are good people for recognizing the little things you can do to make another’s life better. Good luck!

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